The Need for Fathers, Older Brothers, Mentors

Tomb of the Unknown Soldier

I was in Warsaw the other day and visited Poland's Tomb of the Unknown Soldier. Countless numbers of unknown soldiers and unknown men have built and defended civilization. The comfortable lives we live come thanks to the sacrifices of these unknown warriors.

Masculine energy tames the unforgiving chaos of the wilderness. This energy wrestles with nature and molds an island of calm and serenity for humanity to blossom. It is the anchor, the foundation, the lighthouse to shine a path for others to follow. That is why fathers, older brothers, and male mentors are so vital. The wisdom they have brings stability. We clearly see the effects of a world without this calming presence.

The lack of a father figure affects all regardless of gender, race, religion, etc. Without that masculine buffer, the wilderness has free reign on children. Fears are exploited and the animalistic fight of flight instinct is cranked to overdrive. We see how this instinct affects women. They become feminists.

For the feminist, two patterns emerge. One is an overwhelming fear of men. All problems are due to the patriarchy because daddy wasn't there. Any male attention is viewed as sexual assault. The male presence is raping them. If the male boogeyman is destroyed, all problems will go away. Ironically, the feminists are just accelerating and worsening the problem by continuing to assault the male foundation. 

The second pattern can be described as the thousand cock stare. It is another extreme response to a lack of father stability. Like living check to check, survival is living cock to cock hoping the next scratch-off (more like jerk-off) lottery ticket is the father they never had. No father figure means no reference point in determining what is a good man. Because these women have no reference point, the wilderness beasts of bad boys have free reign to exploit them. Hope is drained from their eyes. The presence of a father brings balance to the system. Unstable systems accelerate and spin out of control.

We also see the effects of no father figure in the black community. The wilderness turns black kids into thugs. Drugs and violence are how problems are settled. Even worse, race baiters have convinced them that strong male authority figures (like the police), are not to be trusted. Without a father's guidance, kids are duped and exploited. Asking a child to go from 0 to 1 and produce something of value out of nothing is a nearly impossible high bar to set. Hope is drained from their eyes.

I see the lack of a father figure playing out it myself. I can feel the fear and anxiety due to a lack of a foundation. I have a hyper-sensitivity to uncertainty which manifests in various ways such as procrastination, analysis paralysis, and the mental freeze like a deer in headlights. I went through a depression/anger phase. I remember the feeling of uselessness and caring about nothing. And I was easy to exploit. With a steady diet of fear from the mainstream media, I embraced the fantasy of communism and feminism. I was a good beta soldier tricked into believing I was saving humanity from the patriarchy and capitalism. Thanks to the internet, I found male mentors and read wisdom from fatherly figures. I'm slowly unlearning the toxic material of the past.

The most important lesson a father can give their kids is confidence in their abilities. A father doesn't need to have all the answers. In fact, spoiling kids with all the answers does not help them prepare for the wilderness. It just makes them entitled babies. A father needs to demonstrate that he has the ability to problem solve and come up with creative solutions. And he needs to develop this ability in his children and provide enough stability so they are not overwhelmed. That way, instead of the animalistic instinct winning, the kid can develop an "I got this. I can figure this out" problem solving, logical mindset.

The fathers of the world allow humanity to go from 1 to 2. They allow kids to build on top of the existing civilization. It is much easier to go from 1 to 2 than it is to go from 0 to 1. Momentum is easier to maintain than it is to start. Building on a solid foundation lasts much longer than building on quick sand. If kids are left to fend for themselves, suddenly Lord of the Flies becomes reality rather than fiction.